Why Being Paranoid Can Ruin a Relationship

March 2nd, 2010 Written by Gemma Tomlinson

Paranoia. We all fall victim to it from time to time. When you’re feeling less than stellar, it’s very easy to walk into the staffroom convinced that the whole world is discussing the fact that your outfit isn’t the best thing you’ve worn this year. Sometimes you’re right to be paranoid,
after all, its human nature to be bitchy from time to time, but paranoia taken too far is something that can eat away at your personal relationships and damage them beyond repair.

People are often most paranoid about things they are insecure about. This might sound very simple, but its something that completely slips your mind in the heat of the moment. When you’re fretting over the fact that you think a group of girls are bitching about you, you never seem to connect that feeling with the fact that you woke up late, didn’t have time to straighten your hair and are therefore less than confident about how you look. Instead, you let your mind run riot, convinced that not only are the girls are making fun of you but they are the biggest bitches in the world. They could be behaving in a completely normal way, but in your distorted view, they are acting differently, and this in turn makes you behave differently. This will more than likely result in them actually bitching about you, and so your paranoia has come true.

Always worried that your boyfriend or girlfriend is looking at other people? This is a dangerous one to be overly vocal about. Sure, there are some people that disrespect their significant other by looking a little too eagerly at passers-by, but nine times out of ten they only have eyes for you. If you are constantly accusing them of looking at others or asking if they are cheating, you will eventually drive them away. Imagine being accused of a crime you didn’t commit, and how frustrating it would be knowing you had done nothing wrong. Now imagine being accused by the person you love. Frustrating, huh?

In short, its important to remember that sometimes people will talk about you, and your boyfriend might see a girl on the street that he is attracted to. If you are unlucky, those people might very well be saying negative things, and your boyfriend might very well choose to ask the girl for her number, but this is the exception, not the rule. Is it worth ruining great relationships in order to protect yourself from a broken heart? Chances are you will only drive the people that care about you away, and if you’re constantly worrying about what could be, you will never be open to life’s opportunities. Sometimes just trusting that things will be okay and throwing caution to the wind can restore your faith in humanity. Yes there will be some rough patches along the way, and you may be burned and get your heart broken, but they are all experiences that make you, you. Life is about experiences, both good and bad, so try being less paranoid, take a chance, and you might just be surprised.