The term ‘sexting’ has come to mean text messaging with a sexual content, and it’s becoming a real problem in certain areas. Whether it’s creating, sending, forwarding or receiving text messages with a sexual content, it can be a very dangerous activity. The problem lies in that the majority of sexting is done by younger teens, who are just “trying it out”. They may think it is fun or a game, and they’re dabbling in the forbidden adult world of sexual content. But the person receiving the text message may know exactly what they’re doing.
Has anyone heard of Sexting?
People who prey on kids often encourage sexting, because the child can’t see him or her. They can pose as a friend of a friend, and begin encouraging the child through text messages to move into sexting. They are likely to make the first overtures and even forward a sexually-explicit picture to ‘test the waters’, so to speak. If the child doesn’t object, things get ever more explicit from there.
The magazine CosmoGirl recently ran a survey on sexting and found that 20% of its readers (most of whom are teens or young teens) had sent electronic photos of themselves in nude or semi-nude situations. That’s one in five of our youngsters! And the problem isn’t getting any better. As the children grow older, the frequency of this activity increases. A full one-third of youngsters in the 20-26 year old category admitted to this activity. The concern here, of course, is that as they get older, youngsters clearly are not learning the dangers of this type of activity.
Mobile phones - a curse?
Even if photos aren’t involved, sending sexually explicit text messages has grown in popularity. Many times, youngsters think they “can’t get caught” by “just sending a message”. They believe that a “simple” text message – even one with sexual content – is “no big deal.” And unfortunately, that’s not always the case.
Once a photo, or even a sexually-explicit message, leaves one’s control, anything can happen to it. It’s no longer yours – something that clearly escapes the grasp of most teens involved in sexting. Those “private” messages or photos can find their way very quickly to a social networking site like Facebook or MySpace, and that private photo is now a long way from being private. This type of message or photo often “takes off” in cyberspace, becoming shared between friends, friends of friends, and then complete strangers.
The picture could be one step from the net…
Sexting blurs the line between what is private and what is public, allowing ‘bleeding’ between the two areas, with often unintended consequences. One teenager in the United States ended up hanging herself after a nude photo of herself she sent to try to impress her boyfriend ended up on the Internet. After enduring months of taunts by classmates, friends, and even people she didn’t know, she eventually hanged herself.
Several states in the United States have begun passing laws against this type of activity, and it might not be long until we see the same thing in the U.K. In fact, children around the world, including in the United Kingdom, Australia and New Zealand, are participating in this activity. A child with an explicit photo of themselves posted somewhere, even on a friend’s phone, can then be open to taunts, exploitation or blackmail.
It could create bullying
Paedophiles, of course, are on the lookout for these types of things. They electronically wander around the social networking sites, and will spend time with people who post these types of messages or images – or whose ‘friends’ post them for the teen. They will then begin texting or sending messages to someone who appears receptive. It’s a safe, anonymous way for these criminals to prey on our youngsters. Several children have been killed after arranging to meet a ‘friend of a friend’ they met on the Internet or in a social networking context, not knowing that this wasn’t another teen, but an adult paedophile.
Another unintended consequence is, well, the consequences. Current laws on the books are aimed at protecting children from adult offenders. A minor prosecuted under the law can be labelled a sex offender for life. This is a very serious consequence for forwarding a picture of one’s girlfriend or boyfriend. In fact, in some areas of both the United States and the United Kingdom, officials are exploring methods of modifying these laws to protect the children and stop the activity, but leave doors open for a ‘second chance’ for the young offenders who, for the most part, engage in this activity with no understanding at all of the consequences.
Also, you could be arrested…
The biggest need right now is clearly for education. This is a new phenomenon, and like most, news of the activity spreads faster than news of any potential risks. While the conversation parents must have with their children isn’t always comfortable, it must be had. Children as young as eleven have been involved in this activity, so it’s never too early to have a very frank discussion with your child about what this activity is and the dangers it can pose to them and their friends.
And repeat the talk as often as you think necessary. If you have to tell your child more than once about something as minor as cleaning up after themselves, then think how many times you’re likely to have to remind them about sexting. There are some easy ways to do this, too.
Have a chat about it all
If you see a newspaper or magazine article about sexting, talk about it with your child. Ask questions. Does your child think the youngster just didn’t understand what could happen? Does your child think the youngster willingly participated in this? Were they swung by peer pressure? Should this child perhaps have listened to his or her own counsel rather than that of friends? What does your child think the consequences could be for this child? Can your child see why you worry about this type of thing for them?
Talk to your child’s friends, as well. If you get any hints that they’re participating in sexting or sending explicit photos, it’s likely your child is being pressured to do the same. Call the other parents and form a united front against this type of activity – because if you don’t, there are others out there just waiting to break in.
