We have all, at some point, told a lie to get a date or while on a date. There is no point in trying to deny it or explain it. I have done it – more than once to more than one date. It happens.
We all want to impress the person or why else are we on the date? We want there to be a date two, so often we embellish the truth. What you don’t realize is that we all tell the same lies about the same things.
Yes, lying is wrong and you shouldn’t do but “the road to hell is paved with good intentions” and each time I have told one of the following lies my intentions were good – ok most of the time.
Lie – Are you serious? Sushi is MY favourite food too!
Truth – Sushi makes you gag.
Why the lie? Common ground! But this is probably the single most stupid lie you can tell. You can only establish common ground if it is really common to you both. So before you find yourself on date 2 in your town’s hottest sushi bar trying not to gag at all the raw fish tell him what your favourite food really is. You are not supposed to have everything in common. Imagine spending every date night in a sushi bar – GAG!
Solution – keep talking you will find something you connect on and if you don’t then lie that you need to go to the loo and sneak out before the bill comes.
Lie – I am the boss.
Truth – You get the boss coffee (10 times a day).
Why the lie? We want to impress. Who wants to tell their date “I light the boss’s cigarettes and paint her toe nails if she asks” especially if he just said “I am the MD of a company”. But there is a strong chance he is lying too or at the very least embellishing his position. The problem with this lie is if he phones you at work – someone is bound to say “Sorry she is painting the She-Devils toenails!”
Solution – you have two options – never let him know where you work or be honest. Try doing this before you actually order your food though so that if his bathroom trip is never ending you aren’t stuck with the bill.
Lie – I am really adventurous.
Truth – The most adventurous thing you have done all year is pay your telephone account two days late.
Why the lie? The need to be more appealing than we feel we are. I think this is a standard first date thing to say though. I have yet to meet a person or read an online profile where the person is not adventurous. Is there something about this word that is sexy? Or are adventurous people lucky in love? You have a big problem if your date is actually adventurous. Date two will find you bungi jumping after your sushi lunch.
Solution – Buy a thesaurus and find better words to describe your personality, unless, of course you are looking for a serious shake up of your life.
Lie – Kids Rock!
Truth – As long as you can’t see them or hear them kids do rock.
Why the lie? Guys think it’s what girls want to hear and girls think it’s what they are supposed to say. Personally kids have no place on first dates (or second ones for that matter and most certainly not on date three).
Solution – Don’t bring it up. Don’t ask him if he likes kids – even if you have kids don’t ask. Let it go for a while (at least till past date three).
Lie – NO! I am not married!
Truth – I have a wife and 2.5 kids waiting at home behind the white picket fence. Why the lie? Firstly YES married people date. Some of them do it surprisingly well actually. The reasons for this lie are endless and involve therapy so we not really going to go further into them. This lie is probably the most damaging and often there is no way for you to know – married men who cheat do it so well. They are the masters of deception and play the game so incredible well.
Solution – Try find out as much about your date as you can without appearing to be the next rabbit boiler. If he is hesitant to tell you where he works, where he lives or meet your friends; chances are he has the picket fence family.
Lie – Dickens is my favourite author too.
Truth – Who the hell is Dickens?
Why the lie? Again this is our need to impress. But lying about your education is dangerous. While you may be able to get away with quoting “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times….” It’s not so easy to quote the theory of relativity or debate the presidential candidates if you have no idea who they are or that there was even an election happening.
Solution – Tell her you prefer FHM to Dickens or that the MotoGP championship race is more exciting for you than the election. It’s called knowledge sharing. You are educating each other!
Lie - I am looking for someone to have some fun with.
Truth – I just want to get laid.
Why the lie? Technically this isn’t a lie. You probably are looking for fun but after you have planned the wedding or gotten laid. We lie about this for many reasons but mainly because we don’t know what the other party wants. So sticking to something neutral is easiest – but it’s not really.
Solution – be honest. This is probably one of the biggest reasons that dates bomb. She is heading west while you’re set at due north but you tell each other you both have east on the horizon. If you just want casual no strings sex then tell him that. Maybe he wants it too or maybe he is willing to start there and see what happens. If not then you can both move on to someone who is on the same page as you.
Lie - I am listening to you.
Truth – you are imagining getting lost in her cleavage and really have no idea what she said since she walked in.
Why the lie? Because you are a man and she is a women with nice cleavage.
Solution - If her cleavage is showing, she wanted you to get lost in it. So tell her. Don’t lie about it.
Lie – I will call you in the morning.
Truth – Your number has been erased from my memory forever.
Why the lie? It’s easier I suppose.
Solution - If you aren’t going to call – then say so. All that will happen if you don’t is she will get obsessive and after eating through tubs of rocky road ice cream she will move onto the wine and then drunk dial you at 2 in the morning. Guys tend to handle there rejection differently so he wont obsess but he may tell all his Facebook friends you are a bad shag. So save the drama and be honest!
